Prologue

Wheat Ridge, Colorado – 1890

“Your wedding was just so lovely,” Julia sighed to her sister, Clara, as their cart rumbled along the dirt road toward the Colorado train station. It was the day after Clara’s wedding, but now Julia was due to return to Oklahoma. “I’m sorry to leave so soon, but four days away was all I could manage. My seamstressing helps a lot with our brothers and sisters, and I just can’t bear to be away from Felix for long.”

Clara beamed, her brown eyes sparkling, and toyed with the end of her neat braid. “It was a perfect day, wasn’t it? I’m so glad you made the trip out, even though you came alone. I hope the business that kept Felix from his future sister-in-law’s wedding was important.” Clara’s teasing eased some of the ache in Julia’s heart.

“I wouldn’t have missed your wedding even if I had to walk the whole way here from Oklahoma.” Julia’s smile was all wildflowers and sunshine, the flyaway strands of her honey-colored hair catching the light in a halo around her face. “You’ve found so much joy with Howard.” She squeezed her twin’s hand, and the two shared an identical smile, curved with the happiness of newlyweds and nearly-weds. “I couldn’t ask for better to see when it comes to my sister’s future.”

“I’m excited for when you and Felix have this same joy ,” Clara replied with a wicked smile. Julia blushed, wrinkling her nose.

“I can’t wait to marry Felix.” Julia sighed longingly, still smiling. Even after over a year of being engaged, the shape of Felix’s name on her lips felt like a comforting kiss, and thinking of him set her heart fluttering like the wings of doves. “Your wedding was beautiful, it’s given me so many ideas. Like doves! They can be let loose around Felix and I as we share our first kiss as husband and wife!”

“Doves?” Adam, Clara’s brother-in-law, had been driving the cart silently as the sisters chatted, until that moment. He gave a judging snort. “What do doves have to do with a wedding?” Julia’s eyes rolled skyward at Clara’s surly new brother-in-law. He had once been a rodeo rider, but a bad accident had left him with a limp, pushing him into a life where he lived as reclusively as possible back on his family ranch with his two brothers, their wives, and father. His broad shoulders had been tense and awkward, and jaded green eyes had watched the wedding with a cold, judging stare. Over all, he had been standoffish during the celebration. She just could not take to him!

“Well, they’re white, and peaceful, and hopeful, and beautiful,” Julia said, frowning. “All the things a good bride and a good marriage should be.” She shifted in her seat to face Adam, infuriated when he kept his eyes on the road. Staring daggers into Adam’s profile, Julia had to admit that he had a remarkably straight nose and sharp jawline… for someone who once made a living getting thrown off of bulls..

“White doves? Have you ever seen a white dove in Colorado?” Adam asked, glancing at Julia out the corner of his eye, , only to scowl away when he saw she caught him.

“Well, no,” Julia admitted with a pout, brown eyes wide. “But doesn’t that make it all the more special?”

“No,” Adam replied shortly. “It’s too cold here for the doves, and there are too many predators. You think a white dove – a white dove wedding guest, no less – has the kinda smarts to get along out here?”

“Doves are tenacious, like a good marriage!”

“A good marriage doesn’t look like a snack to a hawk or a fox, or an interesting target to a kid practicing their aim for coyote season.” Adam shook his head. “If the frosts don’t get to them first, that is.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll have to have a spring wedding, then, so my sweet little dove wedding guests have all summer to learn the lay of the land here in Colorado,” Julia huffed, crossing her arms.

“Yeah, spring, when the foxes are catching everything they can to feed their kits.” The corner of Adam’s mouth almost quirked up, but she watched as he seemed to forced it to stay in place, quivering slightly.

“You’re laughing at me!” Julia accused, narrowing her eyes. She shifted toward Adam just as the cart hit a bump, pitching her closer than she meant to get. Her forehead knocked the brim of Adam’s hat askew, and he turned his head in surprise, full lips slightly parted and those bright eyes wide, shining despite the shade from his Stetson.

Julia blinked, noticing the freckles on his face, then reeled back from him, almost toppling fully into Clara’s lap before righting herself, straightening the skirts of her gingham dress with as much dignity as she could muster.

Clara giggled, and Adam’s face cracked into a rusty grin as Julia huffed. It was one thing for her twin to laugh at her, it was another for Mr. Holier-Than-Thou to be doing it.

“Fine! Then what Colorado birds should I pick?” Julia challenged, raising her chin defiantly.

Adam mulled that over for a moment, the only sound breaking the silence was the beat of the horse’s hooves on the dirt road. “I’d say chickadees, but brides don’t like having competition.”

“Chickadees are my competition?” Julia stared at Adam, mildly offended. “How could a chickadee possibly outshine me on my wedding day?”

“Oh, I never said they’d outshine you,” Adam chuckled. “But they’re tiny and chattering and feisty enough to pick all kinds of fights.”

“That does remind me of someone,” Clara giggled, pressing a hand to her smile with a poise that Julia had never seemed to master. “We can’t have the bride getting confused with every chickadee fluttering about.”

“No chickadees!” Julia shook her head emphatically. “We need birds that don’t migrate, anyway. Wouldn’t want them to struggle in the wrong Colorado weather.”

“Chickadees don’t migrate.” Adam corrected with wit like a whip crack, his deep voice rumbling like the wheels of the cart as the corner of his mouth tipped upward again.

Julia felt heat rush through her, twisting in her gut. This argument was absolutely ridiculous, but Adam just had to rain on her parade. “Fine, sorry to have been wrong in the presence of an expert on the birds of Colorado. You don’t have to be so serious just because you want to be right.” She flinched inwardly, hearing how her words came out less jokingly than she’d hoped. “Who wants birds at their wedding, anyway?” Julia grumbled, crossing her arms and slumping down on the cart bench between Clara and Adam, staring at the brown and white horse pulling them steadily closer to the train station. “They’re messy, and smelly, leaving feathers and poop everywhere.”

Clara placed a hand on her arm, drawing her mind away from the argument. “Have you missed home?” Her sister was always poised and polite, managing to salvage what was left of the ride to the train station, steering the conversation away from birds to get Julia excited again.

“Four days away from our family and my Felix has felt like an eternity. I can’t wait to be home. Although, it really was wonderful seeing you marry the love of your life.” Julia squeezed Clara’s hand, beaming sincerely.

“And soon it will be your turn to do the same.” Clara wore the same smile as her twin, the two of them glowing with happiness. Adam huffed, but said nothing. Julia was starting to believe he lived under his own personal storm cloud when it came to seeing other people in love, between now and how he’d acted at the wedding.

With it having been his brother’s wedding day, Adam had smiled and made merry enough at times to pass unnoticed, but Julia had noticed him slinking off alone in corners, staring at dancing couples with a stony expression on his face as he sipped his whiskey. His happiness had been a duty that day, not an emotion.

“For my wedding, I hope everyone there is genuinely joyful, and in love,” Julia agreed with Clara, her voice soft, eyes still fixed on Adam’s profile. The strong lines of his nose, jaw, and brow made him look permanently serious, if not downright broody. Lurking in corners during the line dancing after Clara’s wedding hadn’t done much to soften that impression. Needless to say, her sister’s lone wolf of a brother-in-law would not be invited to her own wedding.

“Your wedding will be full of joy and love, just like mine.” Clara smiled so wide that her cheeks dimpled, brown eyes bright. “Look! There’s the train station!”

She pointed towards a grand structure bathed in the warm afternoon sun. The weathered wood of the Colorado train depot gleamed with a fresh coat of paint, and the iron trusses supporting the arched roof glinted in the light as their cart slowly drew closer. Wisps of white smoke curled from the locomotive stationed beside the platform, its powerful black form a stark contrast to the vibrant red trim. Even at this distance, passengers were visible, bustling about, a mix of ranchers in dusty Stetsons, families laden with trunks, and businessmen in crisp suits.

“You’ll be home to your fiancé before you know it,” Clara assured her.

Now that the station was before her, reality began to set in as the cart rattled ever closer. Despite her excitement to return to Felix, she felt… A strange reluctance to board her train.

“Back to stitching and sewing,” Julia sighed. “My hands sure did appreciate such a lovely break from seam stressing.” She laughed slightly, but it was forced, a thin sound swallowed by the train whistle that blew long and loud, the first of several warnings. “I’ve taken on as much work as I can bear recently, to help save up for the wedding Felix and I deserve.” The admission was quiet, almost shameful. “I feel bad, squirreling money away that could be spent on our brothers and sisters.”

“We spent our entire lives looking after them,” Clara reassured Julia, her voice steady. “We deserve to look after ourselves, and to find our own joy, too.”

Julia sighed, tense shoulders relaxing a bit too much, and her upper arm brushed against Adam’s. The two immediately shared a disdainful look, scowling as they yanked away from each other, as much as the cart bench would allow.

Thank God he’s not my brother-in-law, Julia mused, lips still pursed in disapproval as she turned away from Adam. .

***

Julia clutched the worn leather satchel in her lap, the rhythmic clopping of the horse’s hooves matching the droning of the silence that had descended over the trio in the cart. Beside her, Clara smiled out at the passing hills and distant mountains, blue with white snow draped over them like lace, able to breathe in the stillness and serenity in a way that had always turned Julia positively green with envy.

The crimson dress Clara wore was surprisingly fine for a cart trip to the train station, hugged her curves and whispered of city streets and saloon dance halls with every rustle. It had been a wedding gift from Julia, presented the day before the ceremony. The garment had been meticulously sewn to encourage Clara to have more evenings out with her new husband. Clara, as always, was both too sweet and too excited to wait to wear the dress. Now, only one day after the wedding, dust was already settling onto the fabric, but the sight of Clara twirling excitedly in the dress before they had climbed into the cart had made a warmth blossom in Julia’s heart.

“Don’t worry, Jules,” Clara whispered, squeezing Julia’s hand. “I’ll miss you, but we’ll write, and I’ll even visit soon.” Clara’s eyes flickered with optimism and excitement. “Someone has to help you plan that wedding of yours, birds and all.”

Julia threw her head back and laughed. It was amazing how Clara seemed to read her mind, knowing exactly when she needed to laugh. The dread of already leaving her twin again, after so long apart, had just settled heavily into her chest.

As her laughter subsided, Julia caught Adam looking at her from the corner of her eye. She turned to fully meet his gaze. “Did you come up with better birds than chickadees for me?”

Adam, caught off-guard, looked away, green eyes wide as the most satisfying red Julia had ever seen rose in his cheeks. Taking a moment to stare in return, Julia took in his denim shirt, faded and sloppily patched, stretched taut across his broad shoulders. Despite his rodeo accident and resulting limp, he was well-muscled.

His worn Stetson hat, its brim tipped low, now hid most of his face as he looked away, but Julia could still see the sharp line of his jaw, clenched tight.

“Honestly, Clara,” Julia muttered under her breath, frustration bubbling under the excitement of going home to Felix and the sadness of leaving Clara behind, “How can you stand living with him? He’s about as charming as a rattlesnake in your boot!”

Clara nudged her with a playful elbow. “Don’t be mean, Jules. He just takes some getting used to, that’s all.”

She adjusted the straw hat she’d acquired as a souvenir of her visit. The dried wildflowers along the brim had called to her, longing to be painted, and she had been powerless to resist. “Easy for you to say,” Julia retorted with a fond smile. “If you really did find a rattlesnake in your boot, you’d likely wish it a good morning.”

Adam rumbled a chuckle deep in his chest, surprising Julia. She hadn’t thought he’d been paying her any mind, let alone believed such a sourpuss could laugh at her joke. Seeing Adam smile, Julia felt a rush of happiness at her own wit – she’d cracked a tough nut.

The arrival at the train station left a bittersweet taste in Julia’s mouth, and she hugged her satchel tighter for a long moment even after Adam had drawn the cart to a halt. The bustling station was a stark contrast to the quiet life in Oklahoma where she earned what she could by sewing and tailoring, helping with her many brothers and sisters while also saving for her own wedding., The unsettling change of pace hypnotized her. Clara shrank closer next to Julia, but Julia smiled, leaning toward it all.

With a heavy sigh, after it became clear the sisters weren’t going to budge without intervention, Adam hopped down from the cart with a curt nod toward Clara and a barely discernible grunt towards Julia. No offer to help with Julia’s luggage, no words of farewell – just that infuriating stoicism.

“That’s it?” Julia teased, though the crease of her eyebrows gave away that she really was upset. “Not even a goodbye handshake?”

Placing Julia’s small trunk on the ground at her feet, Adam raised his eyebrows. “I don’t think you’d really want one from me, chickadee,” he replied, chuckling as he turned away. “B’sides, with a hat so wide as that, I couldn’t get near enough to shake your hand if I wanted to.”

Clara’s smile faltered slightly as she saw the frustration burning across Julia’s cheeks. “It means so much to me that you two have met!” she said enthusiastically, once again trying to dispel the tension. “You’ll come around to Adam after a Christmas visit or two, Jules. Maybe a few birthdays as well.”

Julia doubted it, but sighed, appreciating that her sister was trying to cheer her up. She watched, a bitter taste in her mouth, as Adam climbed back onto the driver’s seat, pulling the brim of his Stetson down to hide his eyes, strong arms folded across his chest.

“He could make a wife very happy, if only he were a little less of a sourpuss.” And yet she couldn’t quite take her gaze off Adam.

“Well,” Clara announced, her voice brittle with forced cheer as she changed the subject, “Let’s get you on that train, shall we?” Together, they wrestled Julia’s trunk and satchel into the station, too caught up in their own thoughts and too out of breath to keep chatting.

On the platform, Julia turned to Clara, taking in the honey of her sleek braid and the crimson of that dress stitched with love. She felt that fluttering in her heart, the rare one that could only be uncertainty, and found herself glad of it. Perhaps Clara is rubbing off on me, Julia mused with a sad smile. God knows I need her.

Julia took a sudden step forward and seized Clara in a tight hug, holding her as closely as she could. She felt Clara’s breath rush out of her on a soft “oof,” but an instant later she was embracing Julia just as tight.

“I’m gonna miss you,” Clara breathed.

“I’m gonna miss you, too,” Julia replied, squeezing her eyes shut as tightly as she could, trying to remember the exact shape of her sister’s comforting embrace. “I’ll need you to visit soon so we can get that wedding planned. I’ve been saving so hard, Clara. My day will be as joyful and loving as yours.”

“It will be, Julia.” Clara finally took a step back as the train whistle blew, a conductor shouting for all passengers to board. “I promise.”

Julia flashed her a smile, scooped up her trunk as best as she could, and made an ungainly run for the train under the disapproving eye of the conductor. Over her shoulder, Julia called back to Clara, “I plan on holding you to that!” Both sisters waved, through the window as Julia took her seat. They didn’t stop waving g until Clara shrank into a speck. Julia kept waving, until even the station shrank away into nothing, speeding her towards her Oklahoma home.

***

The train was not nearly as interesting without Clara to chat with. There were a few families, businessmen, couples, and, for Julia, a woman who enjoyed people-watching for inspiration, not a single one of them caught her attention.

Her fingers itched, the blank page of her sketchbook calling to her from her lap. There was nothing in the other passengers marking into paper, and the scenery flew by outside the train too quickly for her to sketch a landscape. Besides, it was utterly boring watching the mountains of Colorado fade and sink into hills, then wide expanses of nothing but plains and a few brave farms. Drawing dust certainly didn’t inspire her.

With a smile, she thought of Felix, and lifted her pencil. She could draw every line of him from memory, and a portrait of him would be a wonderful gift after her trip. I can even color it with my watercolors to breathe more life into it before presenting it to Felix, Julia thought, her smile widening.

Julia thought dreamily of Felix’s nose as her pencil traced a delicate line—no, that was wrong. Julia frowned, inspecting the feature. Her line was straight and strong, not a bowed Roman nose like a draft horse. That was not Felix’s nose.

Sighing with frustration, Julia decided to move on and would fine-tune the details after Felix’s face was sketched. She tried his cheekbones. Where have I seen such defined cheekbones? Julia wondered in frustration.

Julia continued to frown over the curve of the two lips blossoming on her page. They were too full to be Felix’s, and she made a mess of the page with smudges, trying to get the lines right.

It wasn’t until she had drawn the eyes that it all made sense. Out of the smokey smudges she had created trying to correct the strong nose and jaw, defined cheekbones, and full lips, the eyes seemed bright and ghostly staring out of the shadowy, brooding face. She could almost see the green she would use to color Adam’s eyes.

Felix, her fiancé, a kind and dependable man with a shock of sandy hair and eyes the color of a summer sky, was supposed to be the sole occupant of her thoughts. Yet, here she was, plagued by the memory of a man known more for his sour silence than his charm. Julia slammed the book shut in frustration, staring out the window. Adam’s insufferable, cloying gaze was inescapable, now darkening her sketchbook. With a harsh sigh, she shut her eyes, trying to recall the details of the wedding.

Clara had been beautiful in her white dress, triumphantly holding hands with her new husband, Howard. It had been a beautiful sight, their clasped hands high above their heads as rice was tossed around them. That would be an incredible watercolor to sketch out, perhaps as their anniversary gift.

Drawing Clara had always been easy, as the lines of her face and curves of her body were so familiar to Julia—she saw her twin every time she looked in the mirror. Her veil had been thrown back over her hair, revealing her radiant smile, and Julia smiled back at the sketch of her sister. I hope I’m that lovely on my wedding day. It was so easy to picture now, seeing her twin take shape so perfectly on the paper.

Julia effortlessly connected Clara’s delicate hand to her groom’s strong one, tracing down the muscled arm hidden by his suit jacket, flowing into broad shoulders. The proportions were a little off, the groom was a little too tall to be Howard, but not unbelievably tall.

Julia narrowed her eyes, catching the tip of her tongue between her teeth as she tried to remember the details of Howard’s face. Julia hadn’t spoken much to him, as the happy couple had been besieged by well-wishers throughout Julia’s visit. She’d spent more time needling Howard’s brother, the grumpy sourpuss.

Satisfied the sketch was complete, Julia sat back to admire her work, then furrowed her brow in confusion. She’d managed to get Howard’s eyes wrong; it was a difference enough that the entire drawing changed. Instead of Howard and Clara, Julia only saw herself and Adam.

I can’t wait to arrive home to Felix. Julia thought stubbornly, snapped the sketchbook shut again and stuffing it back into her satchel. Her mind was playing cruel tricks from the exhaustion of traveling so soon after the wedding. Instead of dwelling on the joyous memories of Clara and her new husband, Julia replayed snippets of stolen glances with Adam, as much as she saw them as an intrusion in her daydreams of her fiancé.

The rhythmic chug of the train finally yielded to the bustling chaos of the station in Crimson Falls, Oklahoma. It was the busiest, biggest town near her sleepy home of Fox Den, and the only train station for miles, so it drew a crowd. Sunlight glinted off the polished metal of the locomotive, momentarily blinding Julia as she stepped onto the platform. A wave of relief washed over her as she spotted Felix, a vibrant bouquet of wildflowers clutched in his hand.

“Julia!” Felix’s voice, a warm tenor and nothing like the gravelly baritone of that sourpuss, cut through the cacophony of the station. A relieved smile spread across Julia’s face, momentarily erasing the remnants of her internal conflict.

“Felix!” Relief morphed into genuine joy as she rushed towards him. His embrace was strong, crushing all thoughts of anyone but him from her mind. The wildflowers, a riot of yellow, purple, and orange, brushed against her cheek as he held her. Wildflowers, Julia mused. And that other grump couldn’t be bothered to shake my hand.

“Welcome back, my sweet,” he murmured, his voice barely more than a whisper. “I missed you more than words can say.”

Julia inhaled the sweet fragrance of the wildflowers, their vibrant colors a stark contrast to the drab browns and grays that dominated their small mining town in Oklahoma. “I missed you too,” she responded, her voice sincere. Stubbornly, Julia couldn’t let go of that cart ride with Adam. A stone would sooner say it missed me than Adam being able to form the words. Realizing what she was thinking, Julia almost shook her head to clear her mind, but caught herself. I’ll tease him at the first gathering I go to, I’ll make sure to ask him if he missed me. That’ll get under his skin.

Felix pulled back, his gaze lingering on her face. Beneath the intensity, Julia blushed, aware of her travel-worn dress, a simple and practical brown gingham with a smattering of dust from the journey. Her hair, which was unruly at the best of times, felt as if wild birds had been nesting in it, framing her face with a touch of wildness, having taken off her straw hat.

“You look… different,” Felix remarked, his brow furrowed slightly.

Julia self-consciously reached up and tucked the errant strand back into place. “Different how?”

He hesitated, searching for the right words. “More… vibrant. Like the colors of those flowers,” he gestured towards the bouquet with a hint of a smile. “Like you’ve been… somewhere exciting?”

Julia forced a laugh, the sound brittle even to her own ears. “Of course, Felix. It was my twin sister’s wedding, I have never been so excited for anything.”

Felix’s smile faltered. “Of course,” he conceded, his fingers brushing against hers. “And I hope planning our wedding will bring you a similar excitement. But I am happy you’re back, and you look happy to be home.”

Julia squeezed his hand, her heart clenching. “I am,” she whispered, the words heavy on her tongue. Even Felix’s warm presence couldn’t completely erase the image of the infuriatingly attractive man with the piercing green eyes.