Extended Epilogue

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

The preacher didn’t speak on those verses this particular Sunday. At least, Raymond didn’t believe the verse would be the subject of the sermon. An offhand comment last Sunday, though, about how there were thirty-one chapters of Proverbs and that meant a man could read the book a chapter a day in a month stuck with him. If the Proverbs of Solomon contained the Lord’s wisdom, Raymond thought perhaps reading a chapter every day and doing that for the rest of his life would be a good idea.

That morning he read the third chapter, and those verses wouldn’t leave his mind. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart. Raymond felt ashamed to think he hadn’t trusted in the Lord with much of his heart at all. He certainly hadn’t trusted the Lord completely. God had shown him tremendous mercy and brought great blessings, but how much easier might it have been if he’d trusted from the outset?

All of the worry.

All of the indecision.

He could instead have acknowledged God’s providence, and his path would have been directed.

The ashamed feeling wasn’t too powerful. God’s mercy and then His blessings had poured down so dramatically on Raymond’s life that he felt too filled with gratitude and praise to let shame gain any real foothold. Besides that, the great reality of the Lord’s mercy was His grace, the favor He bestowed upon people who were unworthy of it.

He glanced at Callie, who did her best to sit still as she listened to the Preacher. Carson, too, attempted to sit politely. He caught Raymond’s eye, and Raymond nodded approvingly. One of the many blessings the Lord provided was continued growth with his brother and sister. They wanted to please Raymond more than ever before and, perhaps more importantly, wanted to please Blanche. As he turned his attention back to the sermon, he resolved as he had every day, usually several times a day, that he would be the best father he could be to the two of them. Blanche was already the best mother possible, he thought.

He glanced at her and couldn’t keep from smiling broadly at the sight of her. His daughter, bundled up so her face was barely visible, slept in Blanche’s arms, and the sight filled him with pride and joy. He looked back at the preacher and silently admonished himself to pay attention to the sermon. There was, of course, nothing wrong with being filled with praise and gratitude, but if a man of God took the time to prepare a message for the congregation, the least Raymond could do was pay attention. Once again, however, Raymond’s mind returned to his reading from the morning instead of focusing on the preacher’s words.

Lean not unto thine own understanding. That was the next part of the verse. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding.

Raymond reflected that he’d spent most of his life leaning on his own understanding. He supposed his parents dying when he was young and leaving him with Callie and Carson to care for forced him to take responsibility much faster than he would have otherwise. He’d spent his entire adult life convinced that he had to lean on his own strength and knowledge or the people he loved would suffer.

That conviction had led to some pretty poor choices, he realized now. He had borrowed money from Hugh Beaudoin and essentially indentured himself and his family to a man who would turn out to be a cold, cruel criminal. He had left Callie and Carson to their own devices, so they became depressed and unlike themselves before Blanche arrived and cast a ray of light on the darkness of their lives.

Blanche. Blanche was living proof that God’s direction was better than his own understanding.

That was the next verse. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.

Raymond considered it a sign of God’s everlasting mercy that when Raymond proved too bullheaded to acknowledge His ways, He forced His will upon Raymond anyway rather than allowing Raymond to drown in his own foolishness.

He was forced to marry Blanche without even knowing her, and she was the single greatest thing that had happened to him. He was forced to accept Cora and the McCormacks against his will, and they were now three of his closest friends. He was forced to confront Mr. Beaudoin or watch his friends and family suffer, and now, not only had he freed Dodge from Mr. Beaudoin’s grasp, but he’d also gained all of the peace and security he could ever hope for as a reward.

Lord, he prayed silently. I promise that from now on, I’m going to let you direct my paths.

The piano started playing suddenly, and Raymond jumped. Callie and Carson snickered while Blanche shot him a disapproving look as she stood to sing the closing hymn.

Raymond stood sheepishly and joined in the hymn. It was an old standard, and Raymond’s personal favorite, Amazing Grace.

The words were simple, without embellishment. They were a simple statement of gratitude, and they reflected perfectly what Raymond felt.

Amazing Grace,

How sweet the sound,

That saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost,

But now am found,

Was blind, but now I’m free.

Raymond was free. He smiled and joined in the second verse with a powerful tenor, so loud it drew glances from across the congregation. He barely noticed them. His only thought was of gratitude for His Savior and the salvation He provided Raymond, both eternal and in this life.

After the sermon, Reverend Willis made his way to the Fletchers as they prepared to leave. “Good morning, Raymond,” he said, “Miss Blanche, Miss Callie, Mr. Carson.”

Callie smiled and returned the greeting. Carson strode forward and gravely extended his hand. “Good morning, Reverend Willis,” he said formally.

Blanche and Raymond glanced at each other and turned around to hide their laughter. Reverend Willis took Carson’s hand and said, just as formally. “I look forward to seeing you for Wednesday night Bible study.”

“Yes, sir,” Carson said.

Reverend Willis smiled and turned to Blanche. “Miss Blanche, may I borrow your husband for a few minutes?”

“Of course, reverend,” Blanche said.

“Thank you kindly,” Willis replied. “Raymond, will you walk with me?”

Raymond nodded. “Yes, sir.”

Blanche smirked a bit, and Raymond shot her a questioning look before following Reverend Willis out of the church house to the courtyard outside.

“How did you enjoy the sermon?” Willis asked.

“It was wonderful, as always, preacher,” Raymond said.

Willis smiled slyly at him. “Is that so? What was your favorite part?”

Raymond blinked. “Oh, um… Well…”

Willis laughed. “Boy, you didn’t listen to a thing I said.”

Raymond flushed red with embarrassment. “I’m sorry, preacher. I had a lot on my mind today.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Oh, well…” Raymond thought a moment. “I don’t rightly know where to begin.”

“The beginning is usually a good place to start.”

Raymond chuckled. “Well, um… to start with, I met my wife when she literally fell into my arms.”

“Is that so?” Willis asked, turning to Raymond. “I heard the rumor, but I assumed it was something the ranch hands made up. So, you actually caught her from the balcony?”

“I did,” he said, laughing as he recalled the memory. “Boy, preacher, you should have seen the look on her face when she slipped off of that railing!”

They laughed together, and a moment later, Raymond added, “Don’t tell her I said that.”

“Your secret’s safe with me,” Willis said. “What happened next?”

“Well, to tell you the truth, I wasn’t too happy.”

“With Blanche?”

“Not with Blanche. With being forced to marry her. I thought it was just another example of God’s curse on my family.”

“God’s curse on your family?”

Raymond nodded. “After my parents died and our neighbors shunned us, I trusted that God would lead us to safety and prosperity. When we fell on hard times and I was forced to indebt myself to Hugh Beaudoin, I kinda figured that God had determined for us to suffer. I thought, I don’t know, maybe my parents had sinned, or my grandparents, and God decided to curse our bloodline. It seems so foolish now, of course, but that’s how I felt.”

“Satan has a smooth tongue,” Willis said. “He’s quite adept at convincing us to believe the worst of God, even when those beliefs are fantastic and profoundly false.”

Raymond nodded agreement, then continued. “But I see now. I see that God did lead me to peace and prosperity, he only led me down a different path than I had chosen.”

“And? If you could choose again, would you choose your path, or the path God chose for you.”

“God’s,” Raymond said without hesitation. “Like I said, everything I believed before just seems so foolish when I look back at it. I just wonder how I missed it in the first place.”

Willis smiled. “Do you remember the story of Elijah when he hid from Jezebel in the mountains?”

Raymond nodded. “I sure do, preacher.”

“Well, I’m gonna tell you anyway,” Willis said. “Queen Jezebel just threatened to kill Elijah and Elijah—rather than trusting God to protect him as God always had in the past—ran and hid in the mountains.

“So, God visited Elijah and commanded him to stand on top of the mountain and wait. Elijah waited and God sent a powerful wind, powerful enough that it caused rockslides. But God wasn’t in that wind. Then God caused a mighty earthquake, but His spirit wasn’t in the earthquake either. Then, he caused a great fire, but He didn’t inhabit the fire. Do you know how he spoke to Elijah, Raymond?”

“In a still, small voice.”

“A still small voice,” Willis confirmed. “That was a demonstration of God’s power, of course, but it was also a warning to Elijah. God can speak to people with power and judgment if He needs to, but he would much rather speak to us with gentleness and peace.”

Willis smiled and reflected a moment. “What an amazing God we have! How merciful of him to show Elijah what hardship he could inflict yet keep him perfectly safe through all of it.”

Willis’s words hit Raymond powerfully. That’s what it was. All of his suffering over the years since his parent’s died, Raymond had never lacked food to eat or water to drink or clothes to wear. Other than being on the road, they’d never lacked shelter either. Raymond had witnessed hardship more than he had suffered it.

He chuckled and shook his head. “You know, preacher, I wonder sometimes why God puts up with us.”

“Because He is God,” Willis said simply.

They completed their circuit of the garden and Willis clasped Raymond’s hand. “Thank you, Raymond,” he said. “I enjoyed visiting with you.”

Raymond walked to his wagon, where his family waited for him. Rachel was awake. She beamed at him and extended her arms and he lifted her from Blanche and stared into her beautiful eyes, bright green like Blanche’s.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said. “Your pa sure does love you.”

Rachel grasped his fingers and squeezed. He chuckled and tickled her. She giggled and he kept it up while she laughed and squealed. Blanche rolled her eyes but smiled lovingly even as she did.

They rode home together, laughing and talking and enjoying each other’s company. As they neared home, Blanche met Raymond’s eyes and smiled.

He returned her smile and his joy and gratitude coalesced into a single expression of thanks:

My cup runneth over.